Terraforming missions epilogue(?): Taking Amy to meet the Wanderers #9956
Conversation
roadrunner56
added
content
| ` (Yes.)` | ||
| ` (No.)` | ||
| decline | ||
| ` You're able to contact Amy. She has been continuing to monitor the status of Tundra's climate, alongside the researchers from the Deep who she worked with to terraform this world. You tell her you've encountered some alien terraformers who may share her philosophy. She is eager to learn more about them and agrees to meet you in the spaceport bar.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
Could you elaborate on how you managed to get Amy's contacts?
Also, instead of just saying You tell her you've encountered some alien terraformers who may share her philosophy., I'd make this an actual conversation so we're showing and not telling the player what happened.
| ` (No.)` | ||
| decline | ||
| ` You're able to contact Amy. She has been continuing to monitor the status of Tundra's climate, alongside the researchers from the Deep who she worked with to terraform this world. You tell her you've encountered some alien terraformers who may share her philosophy. She is eager to learn more about them and agrees to meet you in the spaceport bar.` | ||
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilisation is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. And their view that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilisation is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. And their view that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` | |
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilization is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants, and their view is that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
I was going for something like: "You explain their view that those worlds have their own identities..."
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilisation is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. And their view that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` | |
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilization is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. You explain their view that worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with in order for terraforming to be successful.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
"you explain" seems a bit repetitive now.
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilisation is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. And their view that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` | |
| ` Once she arrives, you tell her about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilization is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. You explain their view that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` |
data/human/human missions.txt
Outdated
| conversation | ||
| `You fly across large swathes of the planet's surface, giving Amy a view of all the greenery and the oceans here. Meanwhile, Tema'a Iriket describes the condition of this world when the Wanderers first began working on it. "The atmosphere was [close to, nearing] a [runaway, uncontrolled] greenhouse effect. Many species had recently gone extinct, or were very close to it. The oceans were also quite toxic. Now, the atmosphere is [stable, sustainable], and many of the species that were [on the brink?] of extinction now flourish."` | ||
| ` Amy also explains about her recent experimental terraforming. "We believe the planet used to be temperate, or even tropical millions of years ago. We used an asteroid impact to trigger a supervolcano that was close to eruption. The greenhouse gases from the eruption have already begun to warm the climate."` | ||
| ` Iriket thinks for a moment before responding. "Using the planet's [features, assets] to restore more habitable conditions is an [admirable?] approach." The approval buoys Amy, but she is somewhat deflated by what comes next. "However, an asteroid would not be our [preferred, first] step." ` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
Perhaps elaborate on the rest of this conversation?
| ` Iriket thinks for a moment before responding. "Using the planet's [features, assets] to restore more habitable conditions is an [admirable?] approach." The approval buoys Amy, but she is somewhat deflated by what comes next. "However, an asteroid would not be our [preferred, first] step." ` | |
| ` Iriket thinks for a moment before responding. "Using the planet's [features, assets] to restore more habitable conditions is an [admirable?] approach." The approval buoys Amy, but she is somewhat deflated by what comes next. "However, an asteroid would not be our [preferred, first] step."` |
data/human/human missions.txt
Outdated
| has "wanderers sestor done" | ||
| on offer | ||
| conversation | ||
| `As you walk through the spaceport, you notice a poster featuring Amy. You previously helped her terraform this world and Rand. The poster describes that terraforming action, and the long-term goal to restore the warmer climate Tundra had millions of years ago. Amy's work on "equilibrium mapping," the idea that planets naturally "want" to support more complex and varied life, seems similar to the Wanderer philosophy that each planet has its own "will", and that the best way to terraform it is to work with how that "will." Amy may be interested in learning about the Wanderers and their techniques. Would you like to find her and tell her about them?` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| `As you walk through the spaceport, you notice a poster featuring Amy. You previously helped her terraform this world and Rand. The poster describes that terraforming action, and the long-term goal to restore the warmer climate Tundra had millions of years ago. Amy's work on "equilibrium mapping," the idea that planets naturally "want" to support more complex and varied life, seems similar to the Wanderer philosophy that each planet has its own "will", and that the best way to terraform it is to work with how that "will." Amy may be interested in learning about the Wanderers and their techniques. Would you like to find her and tell her about them?` | |
| `Walking through the spaceport, you notice a poster featuring Amy, whom you've previously helped terraform this world and Rand. It describes the actions done thus far, and the long-term goal to restore the warmer climate Tundra had millions of years ago. Amy's work on "equilibrium mapping," the idea that planets naturally "want" to support more complex and varied life, seems similar to the Wanderer philosophy that each planet has its own "will", and that the best way to terraform it is to work with how that "will."` | |
| `Amy may be interested in learning about the Wanderers and their techniques. Would you like to find her and tell her about them?` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
I'm going to apply roadrunner's suggestion on this line so you'll have to redo this after that.
That empty line here doesn't seem appropriate and the second line of text needs to have an indentation at the beginning.
Co-authored-by: roadrunner56 <65418682+roadrunner56@users.noreply.github.com>
| ` "I'll leave you to your work here."` | ||
| goto done | ||
| ` "What did you think of the Wanderers?"` | ||
| ` "Terraforming for the sake of improving ecosystems, providing a place for future inhabitants, is very different to most of what I saw in the Paradise worlds." She explains. "Many of the people there are only interested in terraforming for the economic opportunities.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` "Terraforming for the sake of improving ecosystems, providing a place for future inhabitants, is very different to most of what I saw in the Paradise worlds." She explains. "Many of the people there are only interested in terraforming for the economic opportunities.` | |
| ` "Terraforming for the sake of improving ecosystems, providing a place for future inhabitants, is very different to most of what I saw in the Paradise worlds." She explains. "Many of the people there are only interested in terraforming for the economic opportunities.` |
How does terraforming provide economic opportunities, if not through improving the planet's climate to "provide a place for future inhabitants"? I would think, if you wanted to highlight a flaw in the way the Paradise Planets are terraformed, that Amy could point out their focus on terraforming planets to suit humans and only the ecosystems they found pleasing, as opposed to the Wanderers' more "natural" approach that prioritized true wilderness, even if it isn't helpful to humans. That's also a much more nuanced tradeoff in my opinion, where you can see both sides of the issue as opposed to the Paradise Planets just being mindlessly greedy again.
| goto done | ||
| ` "What did you think of the Wanderers?"` | ||
| ` "Terraforming for the sake of improving ecosystems, providing a place for future inhabitants, is very different to most of what I saw in the Paradise worlds." She explains. "Many of the people there are only interested in terraforming for the economic opportunities.` | ||
| ` "I've heard about a project in the Free Worlds working on affordable terraforming as well. Perhaps we should look into working with them. The Republic might not be too happy about that, though."` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` "I've heard about a project in the Free Worlds working on affordable terraforming as well. Perhaps we should look into working with them. The Republic might not be too happy about that, though."` | |
| ` "I've heard about a project in the Free Worlds working on affordable terraforming as well. Perhaps we should look into working with them. The Republic might not be too happy about that, though."` |
Maybe swap Republic out for the Academy of Planetary Sciences on Glory? I think a lot of poorer Republic planets might be happy with the idea of more affordable terraforming, while certain elements in the Paradise Planets wouldn't want the competition, as opposed to the Republic as a whole being unhappy.
data/human/human missions.txt
Outdated
| has "Terraforming 15: done" | ||
| on offer | ||
| conversation | ||
| `Tema'a Iriket meets you in the spaceport and hands Amy a tablet, explaining "I have stored [records, histories] of over a hundred worlds from our archive here. I hope the translation is [adequate, acceptable]. There has not been much opportunity to test our translation systems for the human language."` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| `Tema'a Iriket meets you in the spaceport and hands Amy a tablet, explaining "I have stored [records, histories] of over a hundred worlds from our archive here. I hope the translation is [adequate, acceptable]. There has not been much opportunity to test our translation systems for the human language."` | |
| `Tema'a Iriket meets you in the spaceport and hands Amy a tablet, explaining "I have stored [records, histories] of over a hundred worlds from our archive here. I hope the translation is [adequate, acceptable]. There has not been much opportunity to test our translation systems for the human language."` |
It might be neat if you could ask for a copy of the data for Ijs' and Katya's Conservatory on Winter.
| choice | ||
| ` "Alright. I'll prepare a bunk for you."` | ||
| ` "Sorry, that's too far out of my way."` | ||
| decline |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
I think this could use a short ending text about the disappointed Amy.
| choice | ||
| ` "Sure."` | ||
| accept | ||
| ` "Sorry, I need to go elsewhere."` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
And you just leave her in the middle of alien space, taking the only translating device? That sounds like fun.
|
really nice |
| ` (No.)` | ||
| decline | ||
| ` You're able to contact Amy. She has been continuing to monitor the status of Tundra's climate, alongside the researchers from the Deep who she worked with to terraform this world. You tell her you've encountered some alien terraformers who may share her philosophy. She is eager to learn more about them and agrees to meet you in the spaceport bar.` | ||
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilisation is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. And their view that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilisation is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. And their view that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` | |
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilization is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. You explain their view that worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with in order for terraforming to be successful.` |
| ` (Yes.)` | ||
| ` (No.)` | ||
| decline | ||
| ` You're able to contact Amy. She has been continuing to monitor the status of Tundra's climate, alongside the researchers from the Deep who she worked with to terraform this world. You tell her you've encountered some alien terraformers who may share her philosophy. She is eager to learn more about them and agrees to meet you in the spaceport bar.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` You're able to contact Amy. She has been continuing to monitor the status of Tundra's climate, alongside the researchers from the Deep who she worked with to terraform this world. You tell her you've encountered some alien terraformers who may share her philosophy. She is eager to learn more about them and agrees to meet you in the spaceport bar.` | |
| ` Surprisingly, you're able to contact Amy much quicker than you expected. You find out that she'd been monitoring the status of Tundra's climate after your departure continuously alongside the researchers from the Deep, whom she worked with to terraform this world. You give her a layman summation of your travels since then and briefly inform her of alien terraformers who may share her philosophy. This catches her attention, and she eagerly arranges to meet you in the spaceport bar to learn more about them.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
The first sentence is a bit of a tautology. It doesn't sound too great to me.
"Surprisingly, you're able to contact Amy much quicker than you expected."
Being able to contact her unexpectedly quickly itself implies surprise, since it was unexpected.
But, also, I didn't have any particular expectation on how long it'd take to contact her. Are we trying to make a point that she was exceptionally easy to contact? If so, why?
"a layman summation of your travels since then and briefly inform her" seems kind of verbose, and I don't think it even says what I want it to. Especially in conjunction with the next sentence beginning with: "This catches her attention."
This is the thing I came here to tell her about. It makes it sound like our character is making some long presentation and only when this one thing comes up does she actually seem interested.
There was a problem hiding this comment.
For point one, I don't have anything against it, and I leave it up to your judgement.
For the next point, the goal here was to try and link both sentences together better. In the aforementioned text: "You tell her you've encountered some alien terraformers who may share her philosophy. She is eager to learn more about them-" This tells me that, yes, the player tells her about the Wanderer and that she wants to know more. However, the way it's presented feels too barebones. It's a near "action, reaction" sort of text.
Why I wanted "layman summation" was more to at least give the player some sense that there was some context given, however long the player believes the conversation went, rather than "Hello, there's aliens who've their views on terraforming." I also wanted the text to be more fleshed out, to feel a bit more human, to keep the engagement from the reader.
Perhaps we could go with "quick summary of your adventures?" or something close to that to imply a swift conversation?
| ` (No.)` | ||
| decline | ||
| ` You're able to contact Amy. She has been continuing to monitor the status of Tundra's climate, alongside the researchers from the Deep who she worked with to terraform this world. You tell her you've encountered some alien terraformers who may share her philosophy. She is eager to learn more about them and agrees to meet you in the spaceport bar.` | ||
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilisation is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. And their view that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers: that the work of their civilisation is to repair worlds left in ruin by their previous inhabitants. And their view that those worlds have their own identities that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` | |
| ` Once she arrives, you explain about the Wanderers; that the work of their civilization is to repair worlds ruined by their previous inhabitants. You explain their view that every world has their own identities and that they must collaborate with them in order for terraforming to be successful.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
As with roadrunner's suggestion, I don't like hte sound of the double "you explain".
There was a problem hiding this comment.
Right... I missed that first "you explain." That's on me. But in general, while I abide by the three sentence a paragraph rule religiously, here, it might be best to merge both sentences with the "and."
| conversation | ||
| `As you approach <origin>, Amy is astounded by the magnitude of volcanic ash in the air, far outweighing what was released by the volcano you triggered on Tundra. "This place makes Tundra seem temperate," Amy remarks after observing the glaciers that occupy most of the planet's polar regions.` | ||
| ` Her fascination with the state of this world is temporarily forgotten when she exits your ship and sees the Wanderers for the first time. "I don't know what I was expecting them to be like, but it wasn't birds." However, she quickly returns to the reason for coming here. "Do you know how we can find someone who can answer my questions?"` | ||
| ` You approach one of the nearby Wanderers and ask if they could direct you to Tema'a Iriket, the terraforming director. They don't appear to understand the Hai language, but they seem to recognize the name and gesture for you to wait in the spaceport, before heading off in a different direction, presumably to fetch Iriket for you.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` You approach one of the nearby Wanderers and ask if they could direct you to Tema'a Iriket, the terraforming director. They don't appear to understand the Hai language, but they seem to recognize the name and gesture for you to wait in the spaceport, before heading off in a different direction, presumably to fetch Iriket for you.` | |
| ` Approaching one of the nearby Wanderers, you ask if they could direct you to Tema'a Iriket, the terraforming director, though they don't appear to understand the Hai language from your translator. Still, they seem to recognize the name and gesture for you to wait in the spaceport, flying off into the distance presumably to fetch Iriket for you.` |
| conversation | ||
| `It is not long before Iriket arrives. You introduce Amy to her, and explain why you have brought her here. "I would be [glad, honored] to answer any questions about our work," she agrees.` | ||
| ` What follows is an extensive discussion about how the Wanderers go about planning the terraforming process for a world. From the earliest considerations as to what the goal for each planet should be to the role of their artificial minds in helping to monitor and guide the process in the long term. Your translator has some difficulty with the more technical aspects of the discussion, which leads Iriket to rephrase some things many times. Throughout it all, Amy is taking copious notes. Iriket also explains some of what they have been doing to improve the climate on this world.` | ||
| ` "The gases [released, produced] by the factories will help the atmosphere retain more heat, which will in turn begin to melt the glaciers and return water to the [ecosystem, environment]. Over time, this will [mix, interact] with the abundant ash, helping to [restore, rejuvenate] the soils all over this world. In time, it will become [fruitful, bountiful] again."` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` "The gases [released, produced] by the factories will help the atmosphere retain more heat, which will in turn begin to melt the glaciers and return water to the [ecosystem, environment]. Over time, this will [mix, interact] with the abundant ash, helping to [restore, rejuvenate] the soils all over this world. In time, it will become [fruitful, bountiful] again."` | |
| ` "The gases [released, produced] by the factories will help the atmosphere retain more heat, which will, in turn, begin to melt the glaciers and return water to the [ecosystem, environment]. Over time, this will [mix, interact] with the abundant ash, helping to [restore, rejuvenate] the soils worldwide. In time, it will become [fruitful, bountiful] again."` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
The final sentence here says "it," referring to "this world." I don't think that works if we say "worldwide."
There was a problem hiding this comment.
Hmm. I was under the impression that "it" referred to the soil.
data/human/human missions.txt
Outdated
| conversation | ||
| `Tema'a Iriket meets you in the spaceport and hands Amy a tablet, explaining "I have stored [records, histories] of over a hundred worlds from our archive here. I hope the translation is [adequate, acceptable]. There has not been much opportunity to test our translation systems for the human language."` | ||
| ` Amy has already begun browsing the data; Iriket's concerns about the quality of the translation seem to go unheard. "This is incredible. Thank you so much."` | ||
| ` "Explaining our work to an outsider has been [gratifying, novel]. I must thank you for the opportunity, captain <last>." Iriket bids you goodbye.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
| ` "Explaining our work to an outsider has been [gratifying, novel]. I must thank you for the opportunity, captain <last>." Iriket bids you goodbye.` | |
| ` "Explaining our work to an outsider has been [gratifying, novel]. I must thank you for the opportunity, captain <last>," Iriket says, biding you goodbye as you guide Amy towards the ramp.` |
| `Tema'a Iriket meets you in the spaceport and hands Amy a tablet, explaining "I have stored [records, histories] of over a hundred worlds from our archive here. I hope the translation is [adequate, acceptable]. There has not been much opportunity to test our translation systems for the human language."` | ||
| ` Amy has already begun browsing the data; Iriket's concerns about the quality of the translation seem to go unheard. "This is incredible. Thank you so much."` | ||
| ` "Explaining our work to an outsider has been [gratifying, novel]. I must thank you for the opportunity, captain <last>." Iriket bids you goodbye.` | ||
| ` Amy spends the rest of your time here in her bunk, studying the Wanderers' data. It seems it's time to return her to <planet>.` |
There was a problem hiding this comment.
Sounds very similar to the first paragraph for the "on complete" conversation. Requires a rewrite.
Co-authored-by: tibetiroka <68112292+tibetiroka@users.noreply.github.com> Co-authored-by: roadrunner56 <65418682+roadrunner56@users.noreply.github.com> Co-authored-by: Marksman <40426530+TheMarksman-ES@users.noreply.github.com> Co-authored-by: Azure_ <42621251+Azure3141@users.noreply.github.com>
roadrunner56
added
the
waiting on OP
Content (Missions)
Summary
Adds a few missions where you take Amy to meet the Wanderers.
I didn't come up with the idea myself. I don't know how long it's been around, but it's not a recent idea.
Amy seems like she would benefit from meeting the Wanderers because of some similarities between her ideas of planets "wanting" to support more (and more complex) life and the Wanderer view that planets have their own "[will, identity]" and that successful terraforming requires "collaborating" with that, not trying to "[overrule, overpower]" it.
Testing Done
Went through the missions. They don't seem broken.
Save File
This save file can be used to test these changes:
warp core terraforming 13+ test~3029-06-26.txt
Visit the spaceport. If I update the first mission, you'll have to take off and land again to get the updated version.